After Alyssa's birth I noticed almost immediately that I was struggling the postpartum depression. I had it after Wilamina but was able to cope with the help of medication. This time around due to changes beyond my control with insurance, medication is not an option. I am having to take matters into my own hands. At first I was mad about it, thinking how am I going to do this without taking my medicine? Just the anxiety of not being able to get it was making me more depressed. Then, after being angry, I accepted it, and started looking into more natural ways of coping.
I joined a support group for depression and anxiety but they weren't much fun. Ha! My doctor has told me from the beginning that I need to exercise. When I came home from the hospital after delivering Alyssa I was 170lbs. I dropped another 10-12lbs possibly from breast feeding but I stopped breast feeding after 6weeks and my weight has held steady at 158 lbs. I am 5'4". I was already taking a mutli-vitamin but decided to add a supplement of vitamin B. It's hard to exercise when you don't even feel like getting out of bed. My only motivation for getting out of bed, apart from the girls was needing to use the bathroom and food, ...and the fact that husband would be upset if he came home everyday and the house was a wreck. So knowing that I had no other choice I began to workout. I feel like this is my missing "peace". The piece I need for the puzzle of putting myself together and the peace that I need to be ok with myself, forgive myself and be patient with myself. I finally feel like things are starting to fall into place.
