It has been over 4 years since I started blogging and working on becoming better then I was yesterday. I kept a diary when I was younger but it was about things that happened in the past and I have always tried self improvement but it was in the physical aspect like being skinnier, wearing the best clothes, etc and although I do strive to be healthy and look my best (some days), I am now working on being a better women of God, wife, mother, sister, daughter, niece, co-worker and friend.
Before I go any further, this blog is also to help anyone that comes across it, It may have errors and not be as fancy as others but it goes along with what I am aspiring for in my life now which is SIMPLICITY.
Just a little back story to get you up to speed. I was born and raised in Boone, N.C. I will be 40 this year in November! WHAT?! I was saved at Hickory Grove Baptist Church in Charlotte when I was 14 yrs old while visiting my older sister during the summer. Looking back over the last 20 years so much has happened and so many choices have been made that didn't always feel like choices. By that I mean I dealt with anxiety and depression and was living life very spontaneously. It was easier to go with the flow and take the easy way than to set goals and hold my self accountable for anything. I was a good child, student and even in high school I didn't party, smoke or drink. On my 18th birthday I met a boy who became my husband and I was married at 19. We didn't marry because of any other reason than we were in love, although everyone thought "she must be pregnant". But even marrying because we were in love we had so much to learn and things we didn't know. We eventually grew up a little more and although we still cared for and loved each other, we decided to separate at 24 years old. This is where I believe it all started...or ended depending on how you look at things.
After separating I did have regrets and tried to reconcile but he was set on going our own ways. I didn't notice at the time but this I believe is where my depression began. I was a customer service manager at the local grocery store and worked 40 or more hours a week and every second that I wasn't working I was out with my friends drinking with daily stops at the gym to work out. This was my life for approx 4 months. I was getting more and more away from God and more into the world, not making good choices and just living life how ever I wanted. Feeling like I needed to escape and start something new, I moved to Charlotte, N.C. just before my 25th birthday in November 2004.
More to come...
